COURSE: Chaplains Program TITLE:
Officer Injury and Death PREPARED BY: Georgia Association of Chiefs of Police
DATE PREPARED: August 2002 LESSON GOAL:
To provide an awareness of the aftermath of incidents involving officer injury and/or death, and an insight and understanding of the dynamics of grief.
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
– Matthew 5:4
STUDENT PERFORMANCE OBJECTIVES:
As a result of this block of instruction, the student will be able to:
1. define grief and its relationship to loss and trauma; and
2. explain the impact of grief on victim’s spouse, children, and co-workers.
In order for the police chaplain to effectively interact and counsel with those impacted by an officer’s injury and/or death, he/she must understand the dynamics of grief and its impact on the victim’s family and co-workers.
Definition and Causes of Grief
• Death of a Loved One • Divorce
• Loss of Friendship
• Loss of Job
• Job Relocation
• Debilitating illness or Injury • Unpleasant Emergency Call
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Grief Reactions
Emergency Response Community
Grief involves the whole person: physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.
The Five Stages of Grief Are:
1-Denial – Saying,"this can't be happening to me", looking for the former spouse in familiar places, or if it is death, setting the table for the person or acting as if they are still in living there. No crying. Not accepting or even acknowledging the loss.
2-Anger- Saying, "why me?", feelings of wanting to fight back or get even with spouse of divorce, for death, anger at the deceased, blaming them for leaving.
3-Bargaining- Bargaining often takes place before the loss. Attempting to make deals with the spouse who is leaving, or attempting to make deals with God to stop or change the loss. Begging, wishing, praying for them to come back.
4-Depression- Overwhelming feelings of hopelessness, frustration, bitterness, self pity, mourning loss of person as well as the hopes, dreams and plans for the future. Feeling lack of control, feeling numb. Perhaps feeling suicidal.
5-Acceptance-there is a difference between resignation and acceptance. You have to accept the loss, not just try to bear it quietly. Realization that it takes two to make or break a marriage. Realization that the person is gone (in death) that it is not their fault, they didn't leave you on purpose.
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Five Stages of Grief
1-Denial 2-Anger 3-Bargaining 4-Depression 5-Acceptance
5. THE UPWARD TURN-
As you start to adjust to life without your dear one, your life becomes a little calmer and more organized. Your physical symptoms lessen, and your "depression" begins to lift slightly.
6. RECONSTRUCTION & WORKING THROUGH-
As you become more functional, your mind starts working again, and you will find yourself seeking realistic solutions to problems posed by life without your loved one. You will start to work on practical and financial problems and reconstructing yourself and your life without him or her.
7. ACCEPTANCE & HOPE-
During this, the last of the seven stages in this grief model, you learn to accept and deal with the reality of your situation. Acceptance does not necessarily mean instant happiness. Given the pain and turmoil you have experienced, you can never return to the carefree, untroubled YOU that existed before this tragedy. But
you will find a way forward.
You will start to look forward and actually plan things for the future. Eventually, you will be able to think about your lost loved one without pain; sadness, yes, but the wrenching pain will be gone. You will once again anticipate some good times to come, and yes, even find joy again in the experience of living.
Even in cases of suicide, often the deceased person, was not in their right frame of mind. Finding the good that can come out of the pain of loss, finding comfort and healing. Our goals turn toward personal growth. Stay with fond memories of person.
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Everyone responds to grief and loss differently. No two people will react to a shared grief experience in the same way.
Grieving is not governed by a set of rules that, if followed consecutively, will make it go away. The direction, intensity, and duration of the individual grieving process is comparative to the loss: the more emotionally involved with the person or event, the deeper the emotional trauma and grief.
Grief Reactions a. physical reactions
b. mental or spiritual reactions c. emotional reactions
The Impact of Grief a. The Spouse
b. The Children
c. The Co workers
The impact of an officer’s death can be a devastating loss to the spouse. The grief can last a lifetime.
The children of the deceased officer are often referred to as the “forgotten victims”. Parents, teachers, and even emergency providers are in many cases not aware of the true impact of the loss to the children.
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Depending on the relationship with the deceased and the size of the department, the connection is not just people who work together, but are more like brothers and sisters in a close-knit family. There are shared moments of happiness and sadness. Members work together as a team saving lives and property. Sometimes the relationships can be closer than with family members.
Test Questions
1. Grief can result from which of the following events:
a. death
b. divorce
c. job relocation d. all of the above
• 2. The _________________ are often referred to as “the forgotten victims”.
a. spouses
b. co-workers c. supervisors d. children